Und wer hätte gedacht, dass es so einfach geht?
http://www.zone.ee/blackmetal/eng/main_eng.htm
Mach dir doch deine eigene Black Metal Band!
Moderator: Q-Marine
Mach dir doch deine eigene Black Metal Band!
i know i'm not alright
Ich füge nochmal die 101 wichtigsten Black Metal Rules dazu *g
1. Don't be gay.
2. Be ""true"".
3. All people who aren?t ""true"" are gay.
4. Be grim.
5. Be necro.
6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible.
7. Break things while being grim and necro.
8. Don't have fun at concerts. Stand around with arms crossed.
9. Repeat all above while denouncing organized religion in any form.
10. Never ever, EVER under ANY circumstances...
11. ...Listen to Peccatum.
12. When someone asks you if you enjoy the music of Mayhem, point out that you only enjoy the music of ""the true"" Mayhem. Maniac is gay.
13. Don't play with fuzzy things, excepting that by ""play"" you mean ""burn"".
14. Don't be Dani Filth.
15. Never, ever, under any circumstances utter the phrase ""Kenny G slams, man.""
16. Don't be Dani Filth.
17. When your mom tells you to take out the garbage tell her that you're too metal to remove refuse.
18. Run for it!
19. Sodomize a virgin whore.
20. Sodomize anything that is not male. (Fuzzy things look out!)
21. Make sure your album goes out of print about 3 years after its release... so it becomes 'cult'.
22. When in doubt, say ""True Norwiegian Black Metal!""
23. If that doesn't work, blast beats can fill any silence.
24. Turn any cross you find upside-down.
25. Nipple twisting is not a blackmetal activity..
26. Write a cult, underground, grim and necro zine. Feature only interviews with bands no one has heard of, even ""true"" blackmetallers.
27. Never ever, EVER, EVER be open-minded.
28. Never write songs less than 15 minutes long and containing less than 15 adjectives in the title.
29. a) paint face. b) go in woods. c) act like troll.
30. Don't be Mortiis (or Dani Filth).
31. Don't wear white shoes after Labor Day.
32. Don't make jokes only your mom would get.
33. Don't make jokes.
34. When in doubt, scowl with eyes downturned.
35. Don't eat Marshmellow Peeps.
36. To producers of black metal albums: remember...no low end! If it doesn't hurt to listen to, it can't be ""true"".
37. Make sure that no less than half of the musicians on your album are ""session"" members.
38. When in concert, always growl names of songs so that they are imperceptible. This will ensure that anyone who doesn't have your ""cult"" LP won't get it.
39. Never play live.
40. When getting ready to go to a show, completely forget that the other people there are not going to the show to look at you.
41. Use barbed wire whenever possible. (Note: this assists in being both ""necro"" and ""grim"".)
42. When asked by a non true BMer what BM is, say something like, ""BM is the raw essence of pure black evil in man"
1. Don't be gay.
2. Be ""true"".
3. All people who aren?t ""true"" are gay.
4. Be grim.
5. Be necro.
6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible.
7. Break things while being grim and necro.
8. Don't have fun at concerts. Stand around with arms crossed.
9. Repeat all above while denouncing organized religion in any form.
10. Never ever, EVER under ANY circumstances...
11. ...Listen to Peccatum.
12. When someone asks you if you enjoy the music of Mayhem, point out that you only enjoy the music of ""the true"" Mayhem. Maniac is gay.
13. Don't play with fuzzy things, excepting that by ""play"" you mean ""burn"".
14. Don't be Dani Filth.
15. Never, ever, under any circumstances utter the phrase ""Kenny G slams, man.""
16. Don't be Dani Filth.
17. When your mom tells you to take out the garbage tell her that you're too metal to remove refuse.
18. Run for it!
19. Sodomize a virgin whore.
20. Sodomize anything that is not male. (Fuzzy things look out!)
21. Make sure your album goes out of print about 3 years after its release... so it becomes 'cult'.
22. When in doubt, say ""True Norwiegian Black Metal!""
23. If that doesn't work, blast beats can fill any silence.
24. Turn any cross you find upside-down.
25. Nipple twisting is not a blackmetal activity..
26. Write a cult, underground, grim and necro zine. Feature only interviews with bands no one has heard of, even ""true"" blackmetallers.
27. Never ever, EVER, EVER be open-minded.
28. Never write songs less than 15 minutes long and containing less than 15 adjectives in the title.
29. a) paint face. b) go in woods. c) act like troll.
30. Don't be Mortiis (or Dani Filth).
31. Don't wear white shoes after Labor Day.
32. Don't make jokes only your mom would get.
33. Don't make jokes.
34. When in doubt, scowl with eyes downturned.
35. Don't eat Marshmellow Peeps.
36. To producers of black metal albums: remember...no low end! If it doesn't hurt to listen to, it can't be ""true"".
37. Make sure that no less than half of the musicians on your album are ""session"" members.
38. When in concert, always growl names of songs so that they are imperceptible. This will ensure that anyone who doesn't have your ""cult"" LP won't get it.
39. Never play live.
40. When getting ready to go to a show, completely forget that the other people there are not going to the show to look at you.
41. Use barbed wire whenever possible. (Note: this assists in being both ""necro"" and ""grim"".)
42. When asked by a non true BMer what BM is, say something like, ""BM is the raw essence of pure black evil in man"
i know i'm not alright
-
mr.selfdestruct
- Beiträge: 1497
- Registriert: Sa Nov 09, 2002 12:07 am
-
Cyrus XIII
- SuperMod
- Beiträge: 1503
- Registriert: So Mai 21, 2000 12:01 am
89. Never form a band containing you, your wife and/or girlfriend, and some gay looking guy. (See also: rule 11)
90. Go to bed when your mom tells you to.
91. If it's rare, it must be good. Order it immediately.
92. I will not add that as it is not metal enough.
93. Are you metal enough to be reading this?
94. Own every Darkthrone release. Listen to exactly none of them.
95. Own cult-as-@#%$ shirts of bands you not only own no releases of, but also haven't even heard.
96. Use the phrase ""cult-as-@#%$"" whenever possible.
97. Attempt to randomly throw the word ""@#%$"" during random segments of your songs. (Kindly refer to Attilla's work on De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas.)
98. In order to make your recording more incomprehensible and therefore more ""cult"
90. Go to bed when your mom tells you to.
91. If it's rare, it must be good. Order it immediately.
92. I will not add that as it is not metal enough.
93. Are you metal enough to be reading this?
94. Own every Darkthrone release. Listen to exactly none of them.
95. Own cult-as-@#%$ shirts of bands you not only own no releases of, but also haven't even heard.
96. Use the phrase ""cult-as-@#%$"" whenever possible.
97. Attempt to randomly throw the word ""@#%$"" during random segments of your songs. (Kindly refer to Attilla's work on De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas.)
98. In order to make your recording more incomprehensible and therefore more ""cult"
